Elements of Irony
by Bunny inc
Summary: Janus and Virginia's team is stuck inside a burning Gunner's Heaven. They remember some weird stuff. And Gallows does the Super Yaoi Fart Cannon of Doom! First Fanfic. Rated T for swearing. WA3 R&R peoples
1. Chapter 1

First fanfic.

Disclaimer: I do not own Wild Arms 3, it's characters, or Janus. If there is some errors in my story, I 'll just let you know right now I am working on retarded Microsoft Word. Well, on with thy story! (Some things from Naruto too!) We are more than one user, we are a trio of users! Fear us! Bunny inc!

Chapter 1: Fire

Fire consumed the place in it's invading embers. There they were, surrounded by the hot consuming flames.

"Gallows, this is your fault!" Virginia yelled past the thick smog. "You and that stupid hypnotism book!"

"What! Snapped Gallows to his leader. "When I brainwashed Romero into doing fireball jutsu like Sasuke; I didn't think it would work!

Everyone but dizzy-eye Romero: "GALLOWS!"

Janus slid down a wall glumly. "I guess we're gonna die here, Princess."

"Um, let's make the best of our last hours before we burn an awful and painful death!" Virginia said as she did not notice her hair was being burnt to a crisp. (Like Micheal Jackson!)

"What are we supposed to do!" Spurted Jet. "If you hadn't noticed, I am here stuck with a bubbly girl who won't SHUT UP, a dumb-ass hypnotist priest, a heavy lecturer, an arrogant asshole, a fat retard, and a brainwashed ninja who is apparently not aware of what he just did!"

"Dammit!" Jet yelled as he tried to put out his ignited scarf .

"Wanna play a game?" Virginia said still happy.

Everyone but dizzy-eye Romero, who is still running around doing fireball jutsu : "NO!"

"Wow," said Clive. "He has a lot of chakra. Hopefully, he'll run out of it and die."

Everyone but dizzy-eye Romero: "What's chakra?"

Clive stood there and thought hard. "Good question…"

THE END?


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Water

"You guys," beckoned Virginia. "Do you remember the time we were stuck on a deserted island?"

Flashback

Everyone but dizzy-eye Romero: "Gallows! WHAT DID YOU DO!"

Virginia stood staring uselessly at the long sea.

Janus walked slowly to Gallows… He placed his hand on Gallows shoulder. "Sorry, but you are the chosen one to be sacrificed." Janus said in a low voice.

2 minutes later…

Gallows is tied to a burning platter made out of wood. (Which they could have used as a raft to get off of the freakin' island!)

Everyone but Gallows and Jet comes in with an exotic hula skirt.

"Oh shit!" Jet said.

Gallows was dressed in tropical flowers and fruits. (Which they could have eaten as food, and used as medicine, but didn't because I don't know!)

They surrounded Gallows in a marching circle. Janus came forward… "We are here to sacrifice the chosen one to our coconut demi-god!" Then, the crazy cannibal islanders gathered around their coconut demi-god. They started chanting:

(OKAY KIDS IF YOU KNOW THE WORDS, SING ALONG! IF NOT, HERE THEY ARE…)

"Umm…Umm…Umm… You offer the lime to coconut and WORSHIP, WORSHIP, WORSHIP! Umm…Umm…Umm… I like to move it! I like to move it, MOVE IT! Because this shit is bananas! B-A-N-A-N-A-S! So wear your shorts over your hair, and wave your arms like you don't just care and OBEY! Bow. OBEY! Bow. OBEY! Bow.

Suddenly, an earth-shaking thunderstorm formed in the sky. A single bolt of lightning struck the coconut. The coconut exploded into dozens of pieces. The whole island was flooded over with hostile storm waters. Blackness took over…


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Air

Our heroes awoke on the top of the "Bunny inc." blimp. They peered below at the flashing message that said:

READ OR DIE. WE OWN YOU!Ourbunny flips you off!

"Where are our shoes!" Said Gallows. "And what is Bunny inc?"

Everyone store at Gallows's pink French-tipped toenails. Their jaws dropped… Literally…

Hypnotized Romero was prancing about as he did his newly hypnotized wind jutsu. Which violently rocked the blimp, back and forth. The chances of falling to their instant intimate doom was plentiful! (MWAHAHAHA!)

"Isn't this romantic?" Virginia said in awe. She peered at the unknown city lights below.

"Your mama, dumb bitch." That was all Jet had to say.

"You know what? I feel like rapping!" Yelled Janus.

Everyone but dizzy-eyed Romero: "NO!"

(FOLLOW ALONG AGAIN KIDS! HERE'S THE LYRICS!)

"What I gonna do with all this junk, all this junk, inside my trunk.

I'm gonna get get Virgy drunk, get Virgy's drunk-ass on my hump.

My humps, my humps, my humps, my humps. My sexy manly lumps.

My humps, my humps, my humps, check it out!

I do this stuff is crazy,

I drop it on the dazy,

They may not treat me nicely,

But I got all the icees…

He never finished the next line… A violent wind from Romero's hypnotized wind jutsu flipped the blimp over. Everyone fell into the dark abyss. Without hope… Without the coconut god… Without their shoes… Will they ever make it back to Kansas? Er, Filgaia I mean. Find out in the next unfortunate adventure.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Earth

They woke up in the middle of a scorching desert. They knew this was not Kansas, nor Filgaia. And for some reason, they were not prepared. The teams had no weapons with them. They also woke up in their winter clothes! Gallows woke up with his pants soiled.

Janus woke up with a cactus between his legs. He struggled to get free, screaming in pain. Everyone ignored him.

"This flashback is weird," proclaimed Virginia. "Come on. We have to find our way out." The teams started walking in the vast sea of sand.

2 hours later…

"Are we there yet?" Said Gallows.

"Gallows, have patience," said Clive, wiping the sweat of his head.

Suddenly, a gigantic worm came out of the ground and swallowed Clive.

"Wow," said Janus. "Tremors…"

Everyone took off from the worm monster. Romero was still doing hypnotized fireball jutsu. (Which they couldn't have used to kill the worm!)

"Wait, I'll defeat this monster!" Gallows said, pointing his finger up heroically. He spun around in circles. And finally, a huge cloud of dust formed. Virginia peered through the thick cloud of smog clearing. Gallows stood up the tallest he could over a peak. He was wearing a freaky blue leotard with a flowing yellow cape. There was a large hole in the back showing off his whole ass.

"What the fuck, Gallows!" Jet yelled.

Gallows pointed his ass towards the monster. "Super yaoi fart cannon of doom!"

A sharp green wind blew directly at the monster out of Gallow's ass. A clean hole appeared in the worm's head. It fell to the ground, everyone scrambling to escape it's trail of destruction.

"Feeling…woozy…" Janus and the others staggered around. Gallow's was about to pass out from the evil on-coming cloud of fart. The world started to close in…

THE END?


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Stupidity

Sunlight shown onto our heroes faces. Virginia opened her eyes to a sunny day.

"We're back in Filgaia…"

She looked at her surroundings. There they sat, in the remains of a burned Gunner's Heaven.

"Oh well…"

The teams walked into the sunset. Gallows opened his mouth:

"Why am I dressed like this?"

Wasn't that disgusting? That was Bunny inc's first production.

Credits:

FusionDemon (For imagining all the funny stuff, also for the "Coconut Hailing" song. She is already an author here.)

Obsidian (For weird and awesome randomness. And thinking up Jet's attitude.)

Chibi Kitten (Myself, for the "My Humps Janus Remix" and the idea for Gallows doing the "Super Yaoi Fart Cannon of Doom". Some of you might know me as "Janus's good twin." Just want to say hi to the people back at the forum.)

Janus Cascade (For being a mediocre rapper in the "My Humps Janus Remix".)

Virginia Maxwell (For dumbness and setting her hair on fire.)

Gallows Caradine (Super yaoi fart cannon of doom!)

Clive Winslett (For not knowing what chakra is.)

Romero Gigio (For doing random jutsu without dying.)

Jet Enduro (For swearing in every line he says individually in the story.)

Dario Nicolodi (Where the heck is he in the story!)

Chibi Kitten: Where was Dario in the story? Flipping you off in every scene…


End file.
